June 28 log

I was planning to walk to the studio today and take pilates and werq classes, but I haven't been getting much sleep lately and feel as though I'm fighting a cold. Probably wisest to take it "easy" in the 100-degree heat and just walk home. This feels like something that can be kicked with one good night's sleep. Also, I generally need to get better about getting more sleep. It's one big area where I consistently fail, and I've heard a number of times that it can contribute to stress, cortisol and leptin dysregulation, etc. So...that's tonight's project. Tomorrow I'll push myself hard in the morning and evening workouts (and probably again Saturday morning).

Also, my muscles still haven't completely recovered from Tuesday's workout. What is going on with this? Muscle recovery has been extraordinarily slow, and I've felt physically more fatigued the past month or so. I don't believe it's all attributable to the hot weather we've had. The possibility did occur to me this morning that I may need to increase my carb intake, so I'll experiment with that tonight, with a fried plantain.

Yesterday's log:
Food
B: Korean short ribs - 6 (650 cal)
L: Bone broth, no marrow/cartilage - 50 cal
D: Tandoori goat - no idea on calories, but pretty straightforward -- meat marinated in spices, very minimal sauces

Exercise
TA omnicentric DVDs, half-assed - 1 hr
BBB prep - 40 min, half-assed strength
teach BBB

Today's plan:
Food
B: Beef roast, no seasonings/sauces (8 oz, ~400 cal)
L: Bone broth, some remaining fat from beef roast (1.5 c broth, 1 oz fat; ~200 cal?)
D: Korean short rib/bok choy soup

Exercise
walk to work & home (8 mi)

Tomorrow's plan:
Food
B: Korean short rib/bok choy soup
L: ???
D: ???

Exercise
easy jog (~4 mi)
TA omnicentric DVDs, 1 hr
walk to/from studio (3 mi)
BFC prep
BFC (teach)

Fructose malabsorption

I've been trying to mimic the approach I took two weeks ago, when I thought I saw real results from the diet/fitness. Over the last few weeks, with the exception of maybe two days, I've eaten a meat-based breakfast and lunch, followed by some sort of movement (mostly low-level, walking) and a dinner of 1-2 lb leafy greens along with some meat. There have been several problems with this:

-My salt intake at dinner is quite high
-I have not felt sated at dinner (and have increasingly felt less sated after breakfast), despite a full stomach -- this leads to eating too much and an overly full stomach
-I have put on weight; at first I thought it was bloating, but it's not. It's fat.
-It's either been too hot or I haven't had the energy to do any high-intensity exercise for two weeks. Yesterday was the first day since my first sprint set that I did any high-intensity work (heavy, crossfit-like lifting and 4-6 Tabata-ish running sprints)

Clothes fit more tightly, and I constantly have food in my gut, which makes me feel sluggish and means I'm accumulating fat. So...this method hasn't worked.

New strategy:
-decrease (but not eliminate) the amount of added salt on everything; I still need some sodium to prevent muscle cramps
-cut back on the vegetables; eating them as a side rather than main meal (I should experiment with eating them before/after meat, but am guessing it's better to start with them)
-estimate caloric intake and logging daily exercise/movement
-possibly experiment with soups? might help to fill the belly without the digestive issues related to high vegetable intake
-incorporate more running/cardio exercise; I have seriously slacked on the cardio front, though I have been doing plenty of strength work and walking


Yesterday's log:
Food
B: Korean short ribs - ~4-5 (400-500 cal)
L: Bone broth with marrow/cartilage - 1 c (~200 cal)
D: Leafy greens roasted with coconut oil - 400 cal
    Thai curry - 600 cal?

Exercise
crossfit workout (Train Like Jane)
run - 45 min, including 4-6 Tabata sprints
walk to work (4 mi)
walk home (5 mi)

Today's log:
Food
B: Korean short ribs - 6 (650 cal)
L: Bone broth, no marrow/cartilage - 50 cal
D: ???

Exercise
TA omnicentric DVDs, half-assed - 1 hr
teach BBB

Tomorrow's plan:
Food
B: Beef roast, no seasonings/sauces
L: Bone broth
D: Korean short rib/bok choy soup

Exercise
TA omnicentric DVDs x2
easy jog
walk to work (4 mi)


***Edit***
My attention was just drawn to this blog post: http://theprimalparent.com/2012/03/31/ibs-depression-skin-fructose-malabsorption/

Many of the symptoms I've been experiencing -- bloating (for nearly 2 weeks, my belly has looked like the "before" photo in this post, and I've lost muscle definition all over), constipation, carb cravings, acne, and headaches -- could be explained by this. But when my diet consists almost entirely of meat and leafy green vegetables, and I don't eat fruit or sweets, what could possibly contain fructose?

The list of fructan-containing foods toward the bottom of the page lists onions, garlic, coconut milk and meat (but not coconut oil), asparagus as containing fructans. Tomato paste contains fructose; tomatoes and red bell peppers also do, but can be eaten in very small quantities.

I don't entirely understand my symptoms, then, although I do eat tomatoes and onions on a regular basis. My positive results a few weeks ago weren't in response to decreased intake in those foods, I don't think...

Of the fructose/fructan-free foods listed, these are the ones I can eat without other intolerance issues (eg, intolerance to eggs, dairy, nuts):

meat
olives
lemons/limes
plantains
yams (not sweet potatoes)
leafy greens?? (the jury's out on this one)
coconut and olive oils

Okay in small quantities:
avocado
blueberries

From reading blog comments, onions and garlic/garlic powder can be major contributors to fructose malabsorption symptoms, so I suppose it's time to cut those out and see the effects. And buy some olives...

Perhaps a "guacamole" of avocados + lime juice + cumin + salt would be acceptable in small quantities...probably no more than 1/2 to 1 avocado/day, if no other fructans/fructose is consumed.

Memory

Since this site is more or less a journal:

I've forgotten what it's like to be in a relationship. I would like to be reminded, and maybe to discover what it is to be in a healthy, strong one. I suspect it would take a lot of emotional work on my part, to keep a healthy perspective; I'm okay with that. It's an area of my life where I would like to see some growth.

I want to learn to be vulnerable with another person, to trust. I want to know how it feels to fully open myself to being in love.

Careful

I feel like I'm starting to get a cold, and my muscles haven't recovered from Tuesday's sprint session, so I'm backing out of today's planned sprint.

Yesterday I needed extra food in order to fall asleep (and yet, still slept lightly and awoke at 4 am for no apparent reason; indicates some additional stress that I haven't identified).

Actual food intake:
-6 oz ground beef (85% lean)
-9 oz pork shoulder (no sauce, just salt and other spices)
-1 bunch kale
-1 Tbsp coconut oil
-5 pork rinds
-1/2 Tbsp almond butter

Actual exercise:
Tracy Anderson video
walk to work
walk to/from studio
teach BBB
light cardio prep work for BFC (probably 20-30 min with many breaks)

Today
Food intake:
-Tuna in olive oil (200 g @ 200 cal/100 g = ~450 cal)
-1 bunch kale
-1 Tbsp coconut oil
-2 oz pork w/salt & seasoning
-1/2 duck breast (~250 cal)

Exercise:
Walk to work (4 mi)
Walk home (5 mi - long route)
Easy run? TA video? depends on how my body feels tonight...

Some results

Friday was the last day I did any cardio exercise worth noting. So it was four days between then and last night, when I did a short run -- probably 3 miles -- to warm up, sprint 8 times for 20 seconds each time (with 10 sec to 1.5 min rest between sprints). It wasn't an exhaustive workout, but it felt good. I still had energy toward the end and muscle glycogen levels didn't feel depleted when I returned home, although my quads were tired enough that I had to walk/run the last block or two home, to give them a rest. For the first sprint session in nearly a year, I think it went spectacularly.

Given that I hadn't done cardio exercise in a while, and that I ate a breakfast and lunch of fish yesterday, I wasn't terribly hungry after the run, so ate only a few bites of ground beef, an entire bunch of kale (with 1 Tbsp coconut oil), and three pork rinds from fabulous Becker Lane. A few hours later, my stomach was too empty to sleep, so I had a spoonful of almond butter and two anchovy fillets.

Given my hunger levels throughout the day (i.e., nonexistent), I was concerned I'd become dehydrated and nauseous during the run; this normally happens if my body is still digesting food. But throughout the sprints I had energy; my muscles had recovered from the 90-degree humidity of the previous weekend, and everything went smoothly.

When I woke up this morning, I had more muscle definition than I've had in a while. A noticeable difference from the previous day, indicating less water retention/bloating. Muscles are a bit tired, but I'm hoping they'll recover throughout the day. Overall, they're less tired than they were this past weekend. Hunger level still isn't too high.

The forces combined in harmony yesterday, and I like today's results. Now, an attempt to discover what elements contributed to that.... my guess is that I fueled sufficiently earlier in the day, giving me energy for the sprints (and muscles were sufficiently rested to complete the sprints); the sprints curbed my appetite, leading to less desire for a huge dinner (I think this is a big contributor), thus leading to an overall lower caloric intake throughout the day.

Gonna try a similar regimen again tomorrow.

Today's plan:
Food
B: Handful of ground beef (85% lean)
L: Handful of ground beef (85% lean)
D: ?

Exercise
Tracy Anderson hipcentric 1.2.2 DVD
Walk to work (4 mi)
Walt to/from studio (3 mi)
Teach BBB
Prep for Friday's BFC (some cardio)

Conjectures

I still can't figure it out. On one hand, cleaning up my diet has had a positive effect on my skin. And I've noticed, in this short time period, some minor and temporary increases in muscle definition. But overall, fat levels are much higher, and my body has more curves, than I ultimately want.

A professional ballet dancer has suggested stretching muscles immediately after fatiguing them. This may contribute to lengthening.

A physiological approach to strength training suggests that resistance exercises performed at 2-6 reps to fatigue (no more than 6 reps), with 30 sec to 3 min rest between sets (2-4 sets total/exercise) will increase muscle definition but not size.

Information on Tabata sprints (and HIIT in general) suggests improved fat burning with various forms of HIIT exercise.

What this means for me:
*Spend more time stretching and rolling muscles, on a daily basis.
*Incorporate at least 2 sessions of running sprints each week. These can be short workouts, and they will undoubtedly be painful at first. But I do think they will be worthwhile.
*Possibly incorporate a few body weight-based exercises with the sprinting sessions, that can be performed to exhaustion within 2-6 reps (pull-ups and possibly modified push-ups come to mind)

In terms of food, I'm not sure what direction to take this. Perhaps maintaining a clean diet is sufficient for now. For the most part, I am satisfied with this, but occasionally (and particularly lately) I'm not sated by the same two types of food, and the large servings of meat are less appetizing than they used to be. I suspect my body needs some carbohydrates, considering the type of food I've wanted lately. The question is whether I should increase my vegetable intake in lieu of large meat servings -- will this create hormonal problems and skin flare-ups? Will I be sated by a meal? Will I be bloated and carry extra weight in my gut? One of the essential parts of the plan I ultimately settle on is that it's easy and comfortable to maintain in the long term. I cannot be hungry or feel weak from blood sugar swings; that is not sustainable.

Day 1 (re-up)

I saw a video of myself in workout clothes today. My legs and arms are much bigger than I would like. Apparently I need to be more careful with this, and do it right. For food choices, I need to be more careful with portion sizes, stop caving to sweet-tooth cravings, and opt for lower-fat choices when available. Exercise is less clear. Would more exercise serve my purpose, or will it simply maintain my muscular physique? I would like for my muscles to be smaller overall, for my body to have a leaner, more streamlined appearance. It's possible that more exercise would contribute to bulkiness and a more "ripped" appearance, which I don't want (it's not terribly feminine, and I don't like the look on other women). Less exercise would mean simultaneously lowering my caloric intake. But I'm not sure what type of exercise I should cut out/reduce. What exactly is making me bulky? Is it instead the food that's doing this? It's really quite frustrating, as I don't know the answer and am not sure the best way to discover it. I wonder if, perhaps, following the Whole30 program as outlined in the upcoming book might be helpful, as the female author does appear to have a very lean body.

An additional confusing factor is why my legs (particularly upper legs) have never been as muscular as my arms. My abs still have a layer of fat on them, as well, that hides the muscles I saw briefly (oh, it was great!) this winter.

What was I doing this winter when I was at my leanest? Teaching 5 days/week at the studio. It appears that I was also eating about 1200-1300 calories/day. Perhaps I ought to start keeping track of caloric intake again, and aim for that amount. This time, following a Whole30 program, hunger, energy levels, and cravings shouldn't be much of an issue. I vaguely remember being tired and hungry in winter, or alternately running off adrenaline.

The plan for this week: continue exercise as per the usual (walk to work, teach in evenings, walk home if/when possible). Begin to track caloric intake, being more careful with portion sizes and dealing with any hunger by drinking teas and/or taking R-lipoic acid supplements.

This week's goal: become more aware of my caloric intake/expenditure.

Ugh...starting over

After returning from the long weekend last week, I gradually slid into less desirable habits -- generally the addition of non-Whole30-approved sauces, and a bit of restaurant food. Culminating in tonight's indulgence in 4 tablespoons of sweetened almond butter, which gave me a stomach ache for a few hours. Quite simply, I need to be more careful.

Starting over.